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March 2004

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

It’s Super Tuesday. Or in my case, it’s a sore Tuesday. Last night I hit the gym for some "light cardio", which wound up lasting about 9 minutes. Maybe it was the dropping barometer, or maybe it was just a "bad day" but today I’m really paying for it. All over: the back, the hip, the knees. Which makes me never want to go to a gym again.

So I did what anyone else in my position on Super Tuesday would do (those two things, by the way, have nothing to do with one another): I decided for now I’m going to wait it out and eat super healthy in the meantime. I mean I can remember weeks or even months where I could do 30-60 minutes of the elliptical trainer. Now I can barely hold 10. But it’s not all for a loss, at least I got a free one week membership to the gym. And as my mother said: "this just isn’t your week."

So I got that going for me.

Time to get out and vote for the next President of the United States.

Wednesday, March 10, 2004

Crap! I have high cholesterol. I can’t decide if this is for real or one big joke. I mean I can’t remember if I ate a double bacon cheeseburger the day before I got my labs done (lately it’s not such a long shot) or what that’s all about. My doctor was funny yesterday. He just circled the "221" on the chart and said "250 and I suggest medicine. 275 and I strongly suggest medicine. 300 and I force feed you medicine." The reality is it’s totally within my control to cut down on meat and cheese and just lay off the eggs from time to time. And to get out there and exercise a little more than I am. So we’ll see what happens in 3 weeks when I go for more blood tests.

And as for everything else, well spring can’t come soon enough. I can’t wait for the days when I don’t have to bundle up before I walk outside. Lately I don’t know if I need to bring my umbrella, a ski hat, wear boots or what – it’s so unpredictable in the northeast. I seem to be feeling OK – "OK as in nothing is killing me this morning" – but that’s always subject to change. My medicines all seem to be doing their job. I’ll begin to worry when my doctor calls in a refill and there’s only one pill in the bottle. Cyanide. (That was his joke, not mine.) (Luckily for all of us he has a good day-job.)

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Dear Olestra-product Manufacturers:

What’s the point of putting Olestra in your products, which are supposedly fat-free, if they’re going to cause "severe abdominal cramping"? I know there’s a warning label on the side of the potato chip bag but honestly – who takes those things seriously? And "severe abdominal cramping" is a real understatement when describing the firestorm that ensues. If "cruel and unusual punishment" is illegal, what gives you the right to sell me rippled chips that make me beg for a lethal injection?

After "the incident" yesterday, I did some homework on this alleged "olestra" and I discovered the reason it’s used in fat-free food is because it doesn’t allow anything to be absorbed by the body. Instead it expels everything that WAS in your body along with whatever you just put INTO your body.

Let this open letter serve as a warning: products containing Olestra are more harmful than they appear. Please adjust label to read "eat at your own risk".

Sincerely,

Seth Ginsberg