Dr. Laurie on giving yourself space— physical, emotional, spiritual or mental
So the holidays are over, just like that.
Suddenly we are plunged or catapulted into January and a new year.
This year I chose not to do any major goal setting or intentions. I found I was craving quiet, and doing less, not more.
I wanted to let go of things, expectations, and inner demands to somehow be better.
I am finding my clients are coming in with similar quests.
One client is focusing on the clutter in her home. Another the overstuffed schedule of things she” has” to do. A third client is re-thinking all the commitments he has made to groups and the feeling of endless obligation to people he isn’t sure he cares about.
In these stories I hear a longing for space. Space to reflect, space to let something new emerge and grow. Space to examine life, not rush to fill it up.
Maybe you are experiencing some of the same longing?
Most of the people I know and work with don’t have space – physical, emotional, spiritual or mental. They are crowded with inner and outer demands, junk left over from previous lives that no longer fits, and a wearying sense of too much.
When you live with a chronic illness, that overcrowded feeling is compounded by all that you “should “ do for your health ( exercise, doctor visits, medication regimens, rest and more rest) and all that you do to resist the shoulds. ( chocolate, more naps than you need, TV, etc).
This month I encourage you to step out of the cycle. Allow yourself some space.
Ask yourself – what one area in my life needs more room? Where do I feel there is too much?
Now, take yourself seriously. When you hear the answer, don’t dismiss it. Pay attention to what your body or your soul says. Don’t override with a “sensible” response.
When I asked one of my clients, he felt his body say, I need space to create. Immediately he began to tell me how creative he already was, and how he had no time to do anything more.
I said I thought maybe the work was to do a little less. Where could he do less?
He admitted he spent a lot of time worrying. A lot of time. He could have filled our entire conversational time with his worries.
So, I suggested, what would you like to create?
Food he said. I want to cook and invite my neighbors over.
It was amazing to me that when he was asked, he knew exactly what would feed his heart, and what he could let go of.
I think you know too.
I think if you ask yourself respectfully, it will be clear to you where you can let go, feel some space, and find your next right step towards the healing space that is right for you.
Let me know what you discover.
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