What are your intentions?

Here we are -- into the new year and new decade.

What do you want to be different in your life?

It can be such a hard question.  We either see so much that needs to change, or we aren't sure what could happen.

But the exercise is worth thinking about, especially when you live with a chronic illness.  Your body and its unpredictable demands may paralyze your sense of hope and your expectation of a future that you can plan.  Thinking up goals is daunting and can bring up the feeling that this isn't possible.

So instead of planning with your head, sense what you intend in your heart.  Bring your attention down into your heart space and listen to where you want to focus your imagination and your energy.

It's not a set of goals and strategies, but more an internal centering.

Let yourself take some time.  This is a process and it requires your attention and some room in your schedule and in your mind to listen to what you already know.

What are you intending for your life this year?

Some of my clients are doing this exercise and discovering some surprising things.

One person thought her goal for the new year should be to exercise more.

She has made this resolution and goal several times, and it created a lot of guilt and frustration for her that she never "kept her resolution."

This year I suggested she listen to what she already knows in her heart and see what she might intend for her year.

She realized that her intention is to be more active -- not to just sit around feeling stuck.  But being more "active" is not the same as exercising.  She can be more active by planning to go out with friends, and that can include walks but it can also include museum visits and trips to the local public gardens.  As she listened to her heart, she realized she wants to move and do things -- and that will get her body in motion, but the physical moving is only part of what she wants.

My client chose to create an intention for more activity.  She took out her datebook and penciled in some times, and then she made contact with some friends.  What a difference from not "keeping a resolution"! By listening to what she wanted -- and letting go of a requirement for exercise -- she was able to move forward easily.

It may take some reminders that this is her intention as the months pass, but the good news is that she is no longer stuck in a rut of doing nothing and feeling bad.

This can happen for you, too.  Let go of some of your expectations of yourself -- and the rules that go with them.  Shift into your heart and pay attention to what you really want.  That will help you create an intention or two.  See if it isn't easier for your energy to flow in that direction and let me know how it goes.

Best to you as we embark on this decade!

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Every morning when I turn on my computer and boot up my e-mail, a lovely post appears from a fiery woman named Danielle LaPorte.  Her blog is titled White Hot Truth and I never know what will show up -- a song, a quote, a poem, a musing.

Today it was a simple question written in large script across the page:

What are you tolerating?

Isn't that a great question?

We tolerate so many things, letting them accumulate on the edges -- and sometimes even in the center of our lives.  Unanswered letters, cluttered desks and drawers, cars that need to be fixed, freezers that overflow so we can't get one more thing in them.  All of these are irritating tolerations that distract us a hundred times a day.

Then there are the larger, more insidious tolerations.  We tolerate thoughts that eat up our precious energy:  "I can't, it doesn't matter, it's not worth the effort."

We allow ourselves to tolerate relationships that don't support our growth, less-than-ideal self-care, and work that is dead-end.

We rationalize this -- but we let so many things stay in place because we're ... what?  You fill in the blank.

We don't put forth the effort to make a change.

I learned a long time ago that our tolerations actively sap our energy.  For every undone project and every jam-packed clutter zone, we pay a price.  A tiny bit of energy drains out.  If you are tolerating lots of things, your energy deficit may be larger than your energy credit.

When you live with a chronic illness, this is an expensive way to go.  You need your energy, your initiative, your sense of power and control.

You can take that energy back.  It is a simple process.

Start eliminating those tolerations.

I suggest people begin with a list.  Don't worry about how many items there are -- or how minor they seem.  Every one counts.  Write them all down.

Look for the easiest ones to eliminate.

Decide what you can do today and tomorrow.  Do two or three.  Then pick five to cross off by next week.

I once worked with someone who needed new glasses and hadn't taken the time to go to the eye doctor.  She also was out of checks, and got behind on bills, and her daughter was toddling around in shoes that were too small.  Then there were minor things like a car inspection, and a hall closet where you couldn't hang up anything because it was full of coats no one was wearing.  She had a longer list, but this was where she decided to start.

Three weeks into the project, she was feeling stronger and happier and more in charge.  She even felt that her arthritis was improved.

I think it had a lot to do with not feeling so overwhelmed and stuck.

What are you tolerating?  What will you do about that today?  This week?

When you get rid of them, I promise you will feel better -- in lots of ways!

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My last "serious" book report is about a book that has really opened my mind, but isn't a title that automatically jumps out for the arthritis crowd.

Written by a doctor diagnosed with a cancerous brain tumor, the author was treated -- only to have his cancer return -- and now he lives with it as a chronic disease.  He describes how he began to do serious research about his illness, and found very specific ways to involve his mind and body in healing.

What captivated me is that what he studied had as much to do with arthritis as it does with cancer. He approaches the disease from the perspective of inflammation and autoimmune susceptibility and what he proposes is as relevant to those with RA as it is for someone who wants to avoid a cancer recurrence.

Dr. Servan-Schreiber titles his book, Anti-Cancer:  A New Way of Life  (Kindle Edition), and his intent is to inspire all of us to take our immune systems seriously.  He is almost evangelical in his approach to the simple building blocks of food, exercise, our environment, and our mental habits -- all things we emphasize on the CJ site!

What is added in this book is a raft of specific scientific studies that support his prescription for healthy living.  He looks at how our traditional Western diet aggravates inflammation and suggests what to avoid.  Many of you with RA already steer clear of wheat, or nightshades, or sugar, but he outlines why these foods create an inner physical environment that encourages inflamed cells, and he demonstrates scientifically why this is so.

He is just as compelling (and encouraging) talking about exercise and how easy it can be to do just a little -- and the big difference it can make for our health.

The most portable of his lessons though is the one that shows the connection between stress and inflammation.  He looks at how stress affects us biochemically -- and he includes the ways we stress ourselves by the thinking we practice and the emotions we allow.

He talks about the "Type C" personality -- the one who is always avoiding making waves, and becoming more and more passive about their own wants and desires.  His final chapter describes some of the recent science about learning to change -- attitudes, behaviors, and even healing some history.

It is possible for the Type C's to begin to claim some space and get free of old baggage.

That is a road to better health.

You don't need to have cancer -- or even arthritis -- to appreciate the wisdom of this book.  Dr. Servan-Schreiber is very generous with his own story, and invites you to think about his science, and feel your way into a better stronger way of life.  I recommend this enthusiastically and hope it offers you some practical information as you work on your own healing.

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