As summer begins and the weather gets hot (the American Southwest will do that, you know), my two-legged pets have been all complaints, frantically scrambling from one air-conditioned building to the next -- as if too much time under the sun will melt them to the ground.

I do not mind the warm weather.  No, I rather enjoy it.  Perhaps it's the wonderful sense of lethargy that overcomes me.  Perhaps it's the fact that much of my perpetual nagging knee pain temporarily subsides.

Whatever the cause, I feel contented.  Just laying here, taking an occasional sip of water, and watching the beautiful blue sky above.

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Of all my two-legged human pets, The Daughter is by far the most athletic.

Unfortunately for me, she's also the one who takes me on walks.

As of late, she has decided we should increase our pace, working our "cardio" better.  I don't know what this mystical "cardio" may be but, unless it's a pork-filled treat, I am not interested.

What was once a fun, relaxing (if waddle-filled) activity has now become a nightmare -- my arthritic knees creak and groan with every concrete and asphalt impact.

I try moaning pitifully to remind her of my the shooting pains in my legs.  She looks down at me with what she must consider a winning smile, saying, "C'mon, Creak, this is good for you!"

What I need is a no-impact doggy elliptical.

In the meantime, I'll settle for classic trickery -- I've hidden my leash in a two-feet-deep hole in the backyard.

No more "cardio" for me.

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